He knew who I was long before I had any inkling as to what he was

Mar 12, 2024 |
Twitter

A brave young woman shares her story of online grooming.

When I was 15 in 2007, I was playing online with no parent supervision. I don't even think they knew I was talking to strangers while I was playing online.

It was an open world game, like a lot of games are now. I was playing by myself when another player approached me...

He paid for really expensive in game items for me and we started talking. He said he would buy me a mount (aka a horse) if I would role play a sexual activity with him. I thought there was no harm in typing things in the chat, so I complied.

It snow balled from there. He asked for my email to chat on messenger (MSN back then) as the servers were shutting down.

Then he eventually asked me for my mobile number. It was gradual so nothing felt alarming and I was a kid. I thought I was getting a good deal.

Then the texts on my phone kept coming while I was at school, at home, at dinner — always saying really inappropriate things that he wanted to do to me, and this went on for months.

One day, I don't know why, but I googled his name. His email address comprised his full name. 

What came up ... was an article about how he had gone to court for child pornography on his computer. I confronted him about it and he claimed it was a friend's computer and they didn't have enough evidence to charge him, so they dropped the case.

He said how heartbroken he was that I had found this and how it felt like his closest friend was now going to leave him.

I blocked him from my phone, email and in the game.

I was so lucky that I never gave into his constant requests for me to turn my Web cam on or send him photos. I always was very strong in my belief that sending inappropriate photos online is far too risky to be worth doing. I'm grateful for my stubborn teenage self in that regard.

The thing that took me a while to realise was that he knew who I was long before I had any inkling as to what he was.

He knew I was a young girl by my user name, avatar — in game character and her clothing, the activities I was doing — I was playing quests rather than fighting opponents. That's why he knew to approach me instead of any other thousands of players that were playing online that evening.

I am a mother now and if this could happen to me 15 years ago, it could happen to my child, it could happen to so many kids.... 


The games have expanded, more children are playing online than ever, and predators have upped their game significantly. The tools they used on me are only the beginning. Now they are no longer using their real name in their email address... 


Parents need to know the extent of it, they need to know it is not 1 in a million chance; they know who they are looking for and how to groom the child quickly. 

Parents need to be educated and be four steps in front of these monsters.