Another real talk about Porn

Jun 20, 2022 |
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Here is another example of an actual ‘chat’ I had had with my son when he was 6 years old.

👦 Why can’t I use the iPad on my own?

👩‍🦰 Well, there are some ‘tricky’ people on the internet who are not very nice and try to scare children. It’s Mummy’s job to keep you safe. Tricky people sometimes put ads on games like Minecraft or on YouTube, and if you click on it, you might see something scary or confusing.

👦 Like people kicking or smacking each other, or even monsters?

👩‍🦰 Yes. And some tricky people put private photos of naked people doing things that may be confusing or upsetting.

👦 Oh, you mean they look like that man we saw on the beach with no clothes on? (We had stumbled upon a nude beach on a bush walk several years ago).

👩‍🦰 Exactly. Sometimes they will pretend to be your age and will want to play the game you are playing and be your friend. They may tell you things, or send you private pictures. Sometimes they may ask you to send them private pictures and tell you not to tell anybody. What kind of secret do you think that would be?

👦 An unsafe secret.

👩‍🦰 That’s right! Remember a safe secret never lasts long. It’s usually a surprise like a present for someone, or a surprise party. It gives you an excited or happy feeling. But when you get that funny feeling in your tummy or you feel like there’s something stuck in your throat, which you’ve told me are your early warning signs, you know it’s not a safe secret. If that ever happens, remember it’s never your fault. It is always the tricky grown up’s fault, and you should come and tell me or daddy, or another safe person.

👦 And you won’t be cross?

👩‍🦰 Never. Even if it’s something I’ve asked you not to do. You are little and I expect you to make mistakes. It’s my job to help you when you do. Besides, we all make mistakes.

👦 Do you make mistakes Mummy?

👩‍🦰 I do, everyone makes mistakes

👦 And will you be cross with the tricky person?

👩‍🦰 Yes, but I’ll always know what to do. You won’t have to worry about it again because Mummy will sort it out. Remember it’s my job to keep you safe.

🌟 This may seem like a long chat, and sometimes the whole chat is not possible.

🌟 My best advice is to strike while the iron’s hot - if your child raises an issue, use it to introduce a ‘chat’. It’s during these moments that my son is the most curious, and we’ve had some wonderful chats as a result.

🌟 Be mindful of your child’s cues—the minute they seem to have lost interest, move on to something else. Lengthy conversations don’t work and may make it more difficult to raise the subject again.